We usually experience the year-end in our lives full of confusion, grief, anger, frustration, uncertainty, fear, anxiety and pain. Why is that? It is hard to explain but it is always hard to end than to start a new beginning because endings are always filled with questions of why, rather than answers.
Starting over with anything: life... events...relationship.... are always filled with hope, anticipation, energy, desire, adventure, excitement, joy and wonder.
Starting over (in a new career, job, relationship, city or phase of life) is not that easy, but it need not be a frustrating experience. It involves stages of that accomplished successfully will give the utmost happiness and fulfillment in our lives..They are:
-dot the endings
-spend some time reflecting on the forthcoming new beginning
-embrace new beginning
Understanding these phases and integrating their principles to our life can smooth the process from old endings to new beginnings.
Life is. Change is. The future will be. The past was. No one can change the rules. We can however learn the rules and apply their teachings to insure a happy, fulfilling, peaceful and successful life.
Many people embark on a new beginning without ever declaring an ending. Because they never put closure on the passing of an event or situation.
Each circumstance in life brings with it the opportunity for personal growth new insight, higher awareness and fresh understanding. Each person in our life brings with him or her a mirror to reflect back to us our stuff and the opportunity to learn about ourselves. People and events or circumstances are mentors to help us see the areas in our life where we need more learning.
You can't manage your way out of circumstances or relationships that were brought into your life as a result of your beliefs, values, expectations or attitudes. Reflection is a vital tool if we are to "self-discover" those areas of our personality, psyche or consciousness that are contributing to our reality.
Life is dynamic, changing and evolving. Endings are a natural by-product of the life process. Whether it is declaring an ending to a habit, way of life or a fifty-year old relationship or career, the rules would still be the same.
The first step is to declare an ending. Declaring endings means really letting go. Once and for all.
How can you declare endings?....
First: stop giving them ( person, relationship, problem, career, event or circumstance, time, energy, thought, consciousness ) control over your now- moments.
Second: pick apart the feelings, conditions, and circumstances and look for the possible lessons to be learned.
Third: survey how this current turn in the road of your life is consistent with your past life style issues, dramas or conditions. and see why and/or how it was necessary to propel you toward your ultimate destiny in life.
Fourth: let go and become an observer of yourself in action. Become a witness to your thoughts, behaviors, feelings and emotions.
Fifth, stay in the present. Don't let them ( person, event or circumstance pull you back into the past ) push you into the future, with, "what could have been if only......."
Sixth, accept the reality of this change event.
Seventh: refuse to give up the power in your life to this outside condition or person.
Eighth: have a symbolic closing ceremony of some kind to bring closure to the ending.
Ninth: relax, the universe runs perfectly with or without your desire to modify outcomes
and circumstances.
Tenth: recognize that there are predictable feelings or attitudes after any loss: shock. denial, anger and acceptance.
Starting over can be a rewarding, exciting fun-filled experience teeming with new people, views, knowledge and ideas. It can also be a scary, uncertain and stress-filled time loaded with unknowns.
Which road you take is up to you.
Which outcome you experience is up to you.
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